VII. The Jack of Clubs Speaks to His Queen

I am leaving now.

I am coming back to the city to find you.

VIII. A Queen No Longer

I have lost my gift. The future is now madness.

I have lost you. You did not even deem it fit to secure a proper parting.

I wrote you my confession, but I thought I need not give it, since the cards told me you would decide to stay.

The cards have learned to deceive me now, the way I deceived them.

To the men who found my gift alluring, I’ve become as dull and shapeless as their lives. They have nothing to do with me now. Since the day I learned to cheat you, I have become the master of deception. I wander this town aimlessly now, shuffling my now useless pack of cards, challenging children with a few coins to a gambling game. I play cards with them, and then I take their money.

I am writing you this letter by an abandoned dirt path that leads to a forgotten stream. It is quiet here, where I am, the early morning sounds and the quiet of late evening mark my days. I wake up as usual, take long walks to the town market, and walk quietly among people whose language I cannot speak. But I ply my trade here, I have nowhere to go. They refuse to speak to me. Signs and guttural sounds and pantomimes sustain me - a few vigorous gesticulations and I can pick out the fish I want to take home.

If I let my mind drift long enough, I can pretend I don’t need you.

At night, I lie awake in the improvised hammock I made, watching the stars. The comforting sound of rustling leaves and crickets and the swishing sounds of the breeze allow me some measure of peace.